When She Calls You Short, But She's Shorter
When She Calls You Short, But She's Shorter
Published March 2018
You just got some hair on your chest and you test the bass in your voice by reciting some cheesy line you heard in your favorite rom-com. You muster up all of the confidence to trot toward that beautiful fox you had your eyes on for the longest. Now all if you have to do is ask her out... And you do it! Only to hear in response that you're too short for her.
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What in the farfegnugen? But wait a minute, she's six inches shorter than you! Welcome to the wonderful world of dating. Congrats skipper, you've just got a glimpse into your perceived SMV. Keep reading.
DON'T WOMEN LIKE TALLER GUYS?
Yes, indeed they generally do. If you have to ask this question, then you're probably not tall (which is most likely why you're reading this piece), and that's what they're looking for. You were indoctrinated into idea of the male-taller norm every time you watched a Disney Movie, a Television sitcom, a Broadway play or pretty much anything out of the mainstream media.
After seeing every man sweep their weakness off of their feet, you thought "I can do that too!". You've probably heard that you were short from some women and some disparaging comments about your height, but who cares. There are plenty of shorter women out there after all right? Well yes, but there's something you should know.
TALLER THAN, OR JUST TALL?
Think about how what makes women attractive to us. You go to your favorite lounge or social event and see a bunch of ladies. Some are gorgeous in the face, some not so much. Some are thin, some are plump. You sort them in terms of attractiveness, one (or a few) stands out and then make your move. Sure personality matters, but a pretty smile and high cheekbones is that gateway. Well, women do the same.
Many Short Women Tend To Project Their Own "Complexes" In Their Dating Choices
When a woman says you're short, she is not comparing you to herself, but rather comparing you to other men. 5'9-5'11 is the bona fide average in the west and most men fall in or around that height range. It is this height range which will consist of most of the men she sees day-to-day. Anything above or below that stands out and thus she will judge. Above and it's "wow". Below and it's either neutral or flat-out "meh".
See Also: Beware Of The Reformed Heightist Woman
That 5'1 woman who seems "just perfect" for you is well aware of this and will might be one of the many who actively avoid you to prove to herself that she can bag a "regular guy", hence the "just because I am short doesn't mean I like short guys tee-hee" trope you will quickly become tired of hearing. There is no shortage of "less than 5'10 need not apply" online even from women a foot below the men they crave.
SO NOW WHAT?
Okay cowboy, so far you've received a fair amount of information which will save you months or years of wondering "what's wrong" (I for one didn't really "get this" until my late 20s because of my relative dating successes until that a-ha moment). What's next? Well, for one, you keep this in mind but play accordingly. Dating is a numbers game, especially for us men since we're the ones who generally do the pursuing.
Women are not a monolith. Height preferences vary from person to person.
Next, think of all of the reasons you don't want to date certain types of women. She may not be facially attractive, she might be overweight (a "BBW"), she may have kids, may have had many sexual partners, may have a nasty shopping habit, etc. Don't let women shame you into believing that those preferences are not legitimate (god help me if I hear another "there are guys out there who only want D-cups or better". In what reality do men like that exist?). Likewise, let them have their fun and accept their desires for what they are.
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CONCLUSION
Rather than lament (I am well aware that is a tough pill to swallow), max out what you can control - fitness, diet, grooming, fashion, career and then roll the dice. You can hold out and work to get what you want out of the meat market or compromise. There are plenty of shorter men who have active dating lives and many more who have married off (and no, I'm not referring to the rich and famous either). There are plenty of articles on this site on what you can do to increase your odds. Everyone has something they have to work against. We wear ours like a badge of honor. Know thy landscape and play to win, even if it means playing a little harder.
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