WHY!?

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Jelly Kelly
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WHY!?
post #1

Why do some men who are shorter feel the need to work out all the time? My boyfriend has always been into fitness but he suddenly has become so wrapped up in his fitness and building muscle that we hardly see each other because he would rather be at the gym! When I brought it up he got pissed and said something about me being too out of shape. So because I was hurt I said "You only do this to yourself because you feel you need more muscle to compensate for your height!". After the word height left my lips and I knew it was not going to end well. We got into a huge fight. He left and here I am venting. He basically said I was right in so many words. Why do shorter men do this to themselves? If you enjoy it, go for it but don't use it as a crutch. Specially when you ALREADY have a woman who loves you for you.

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GoKnicks
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Re: WHY!?
post #2

Well, him making a "out of shape reference" can mean many different things. He didn't call you fat or tell you, YOU HAVE TO LOSE WEIGHT. He simply feels, more than likely, you are not active enough. I have been with a few thicker gals to the average standard desired size 4 (talking size 12) most women want to be and they always took care of themselves and moved a lot showing me they are healthy even though they carry more fat.

But onto the issue at hand, I think he is having his doubts about you because he is scared to lose and if so day every came, he wants to be in the best shape he can be to make up for his height. 

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Jinx
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Re: WHY!?
post #3

Sounds like he is just being a sad sally if you ask me. lol I guess some men struggle worse than others but he shouldn't feel the NEED to get bigger to make up for anything. That right there tells a lot about his lack of self confidence. 

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Bonez
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Re: WHY!?
post #4

I don't mean to come off as a dick but you need to get this in check. This isn't the first time you are complaining about his reactions on here. No man wants to be with a woman who always lowers herself, calls herself fat, ugly, ect... And no woman should put up with a man doing the same.

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Spider
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Re: WHY!?
post #5

Quote:

Originally posted by Bonez

I don't mean to come off as a dick but you need to get this in check. This isn't the first time you are complaining about his reactions on here. No man wants to be with a woman who always lowers herself, calls herself fat, ugly, ect... And no woman should put up with a man doing the same.

I thought this too. Like I remember reading something and feeling bad but at this point.. Not sure.

 

Kelly, you need to decide if you want to wait and see if he gets better or move on. You will never be happy living with someone who does this to themselves, trust me. My ex was like this.

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SharkApple
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Re: WHY!?
post #6

Coming from one gal to another, I have been in these types of relationships and they suck. I have been in them with short men, tall men, thin men, fat men... They all had one thing in common... A HUGE...Lack of confidence. lol 

 

But seriously. Don't get stuck putting up with this forever. 

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Jelly Kelly
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Re: WHY!?
post #7

Thanks for all your feedback. Instead of answering one at a time I will just do this all in one post. I get what everyone is saying. His lack of confidence is annoying and hurtful to say the least. I know there is nothing I can do to build it up, other than temporary fixes. I love him but it is getting to the point where I think we may need a break or something. I am not sure what to do. I am going to give in all of October and if nothing changes, I am going to talk with him about everything.

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SharkApple
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Re: WHY!?
post #8

Quote:

Originally posted by Jelly Kelly

Thanks for all your feedback. Instead of answering one at a time I will just do this all in one post. I get what everyone is saying. His lack of confidence is annoying and hurtful to say the least. I know there is nothing I can do to build it up, other than temporary fixes. I love him but it is getting to the point where I think we may need a break or something. I am not sure what to do. I am going to give in all of October and if nothing changes, I am going to talk with him about everything.

Don't let it go either. If things don't change, don't back down. You will regret it. My friend married a man who was like this and after 2 kids and so many fights, he left her for another woman claiming she gave him confidence. 

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