Jacksplat-- Yes, quite depressed.  No, never really, really, truly over it. 

Last winter I counseled myself -- read the books and websites on the subject, and started writing.  I created a long paper about ALL the aspects of being short, all the frustrations, etc.  I worked it out.  I resolved it myself, because I knew that no one could do it for me, and I wanted to feel free, and joyful instead of always seething inside.

I have a best friend, about 5'9"-- very average, and he's oblivious to the height issues.  He HATED it when I sniped about being short, and snarled about how much I hated it, because he wanted me to just accept it and get past it.  So, he was delighted when I told him he would never hear me snipe again. 

Am I glad I'm not tall enough? Hardly.  I have come to grips with it, that's all.  Just for my own sake, so that I stop fuming over it.  It's still a pain in the neck, but I am now spending my energy doing other things and not fighting it.

If I can help you at all, I'd be glad to.  We have to help each other, because no tall man, and no woman can EVER know the gut-wrenching pain of knowing you will never 'measure up' your whole life.    

No, not Madison-- though i would love to do that role someday-- someone from church history that you're probably unfamiliar with.

I've been happily married for 32 years. My wife and I met through a church-sponsored singles group, which in our day in the 1980s spawned 19 couples in 6 years.  She finds tall men overbearing, scary, threatening.... she wanted a husband who was small but well-built and creative and funny.  I was looking for a woman who was those things as well, and one who loved me regardless of my size.  She likes what's in my head, not how far off the ground it is.  she's 5'2". 

Yes, I was quite frustrated with the woman who didn't follow the measurements. It's a microcosm of the entire life of a short guy in one incident: The world serves up a one size fits all attitude. We get 'short-changed' and we're expected to handle it graciously. We have to be the ones to make up for others' lack of sensitivity, and make the best of an insulting situation.  People are pleased with our stellar performance. ("How could a guy that short be SO competent??")  It's our whole life...

I was recently asked to portray a historical figure in a skit at a re-enactment, and heartily agreed to, because I do that sort of thing well-- and especially because in real life, ages ago, the man I would be portraying was also 5'4".  Perfect fit, eh?  I was asked to send a complete set of measurements so that the costume could be made just for me, since I was the perfect size for the role.  Well, I arrived at the re-enactment yesterday to don my costume, and guess what?  The organizer hands me the costume...you guessed it...perfectly tailored for a 'real man' that's about 5"10 or so.  Yup, there was the long robe draping an extra 6 or 7" onto the floor, beyond my shoes. And there I am holding in my disappointment, insult, humiliation, and anger.  

Folks, the show must go on.  I and my wonderful wife snuck away silently and quickly, and she hemmed it up 7" so that it fit me.  I re-appeared in a fitting costume and did an outstanding job of playing my role, much to the delight of all involved, and with nary a word from me revealing my honest feelings.  

Just another classic moment of one of us misfit underlings having to cope with the unsympathetic empire of 'regular sizes.' 

I was told that, even though I am going to use it indefinitely, just in case someday in the future someone taller played the role of a man everyone knows was 5'4", the costume would be big enough.  OK-- I get the practicality.  So, all they had to do to spare my feelings (not to mention the panic just before show time) was to have it hemmed correctly for me ahead of time.   

Welcome. I hope you gain insight and support from all that we talk about.  Just curious-- do people in your family make a big deal about the height differential in your presence?  Are you often stuck in uncomfortable situations of having to stand around and talk to people, being eye-level with their chests?  From my perspective at 5'4", 5'7" seems like the low end of normal.  I have to interact with other men occasionally in a variety of settings (work, public, professional associations, church, etc.) that are 6'6" and it is painful for me, at best.  I avoid having to stand next to them and talk to them often-- but it depends on their temperament.  I have a co-worker that admires me and respects me a great deal - he and I are good friends. We NEVER ever bring up the height issue, nor do any of our coworkers and students (at a college).  He's 6'6" and built like a linebacker.  He and I love doing word play, and we share common beliefs, interests, etc.  I have no problem being around him.  But, I know someone else who feels compelled to bring up the height issue and rub it in my face.  I avoid him like the plague.  What is your experience?